The Skeletons from the Haunted House



Name: Unknown
Category: Supernatural beings, Undead, Living Dead, Skeletons
Age: Unknown
Origin: Unknown
Habitat: The Haunted House
General Description: Funky skeletons with passion for music and choreography
Friends, Associates, and Sidekicks: Spiders and Bats
Sworn Enemies: None
Special Powers:
- Each bone of the Skeletons from the Haunted House is tuned to a specific pitch of the musical scale, which allows their bodies to be used as percussion instruments.
- Amazing structural flexibility of the bones allows them to squeeze through the smallest possible openings as well as to perform dance routines of amazing complexity.
- Do not underestimate the physical strength of these monsters – they can bend metal with a truly amazing ease.
Weapons of Choice: The mere appearance of an animated skeleton can frighten even the bravest of us... Their passion for dancing does not make them any less disturbing.
Weaknesses: The bones are held together by some unknown power and tend to often get disjointed, turning these monsters into piles of bones... Conveniently the skeletons can quickly reassemble themselves at a moment's notice. This process has not yet been explained by the scientists and further research of this phenomena is needed.
Hobbies: Dancing of course!
Pet Peeves: Victims that do not know how to play any musical instruments.
Best Lines: - Play! PLAY!
Total Estimated Power Rating: 8
2 Base Intellect Points + 4 Base Physical Power Points + 1 Shock Point + 1 Relative Invulnerability Point
Danger Level: Very low. They might scare you, but as long as you can play a funky tune you should be okey. The Undead from the Haunted House are even able to assist you in this task...
Identification: Not many of the undead share these monsters' love of dance and music, so identifying them should not be too challenging.
How to Avoid: Don't go into Haunted Houses... Especially if you can't play a tune to save your life!
Suggested Actions in Case of Encounter: Find the nearest music instrument and start playing...
Suggested Killing Techniques: Although these monsters are already dead we can speculate that physical destruction of the osseous matter that these monsters are made of should be sufficient. Whether you chose to grind them into powder or incinerate them is totally up to you.
Additional Character Images:



Movies and Books Featuring the Character:
- Haunted House (1929)

Sasquatch from Sasquatch Hunters

Name: Lucy and others (real names unknown)
Category: Monster, Animal, Mammal, Ape, Abominable Snowman, Sasquatch
Age: Various
Origin: North American Woods
Habitat: If when traveling through the North American wilderness you come upon a land completely devoid of any signs of wildlife – you are probably approaching Sasquatch habitat (or Exxon Mobil headquarters.) The Sasquatch are so successful as hunters that even scavenger animals avoid encroaching upon their territory... which explains the silence...
General Description: A close relative of Gigantopithecus that made its way to North America. Basically a giant bi-pedal gorilla. Developed a surprisingly sophisticated society signified by the burial ceremony, advanced hunting techniques (including utilizing trap pits), etc.
Friends, Associates, and Sidekicks: None
Sworn Enemies: Anthropologists, Paleontologists, and other gravedigger-ologists.
Special Powers: The size of this creature alone can count as a special power
Weapon(s) of choice: Bare hands and claws. These guys are really not picky as far as killing is concerned – they can slam you against a tree trunk, rip your throat out with their fangs, etc.
Weakness(es): Unlike some other Sasquatch, this particular Bigfoot sub-specie is cursed with a rather pathetic vision. Even the victims located a few dozen feet away appear blurry.
Hobbies: Unknown. It is unclear how far advanced their society has become since not many people that encountered these beasts close enough to observe them lived to tell the story. For all we know they might be into computer games.
Pet Peeves: Anyone and anything that intrudes onto their territory
Best Lines: N/A
Total Estimated Power Rating: 8
2 Base Intellect Points + 5 Base Physical Power Points + 1 Shock Point
Danger Level: High. This Sasquatch sub-specie is one of the most aggressive and dangerous. If they set their mind on killing you, you might as well lay down, relax, and try to enjoy the experience of facing the mother nature in all her glory.
Identification: A typical Sasquatch from Sasquatch Hunters often looks like a guy in a gorilla suit when viewed from a distance. When it is close enough for you to realize that you were wrong identifying it as such when in fact it was actually a computer generated image – it’s usually too late.
NOTE: Considering the fact that encountering any Sasquatch is almost always a deadly experience, don’t sweat it trying to figure out the exact biological classification of the beast. Here is a simple rule of s thumb – if you live in North America and see a giant gorilla outside the zoo – run first, identify the humanoid specie later.
NOTE 2: Always run away and not towards the animal
How to Avoid: Please, under no circumstances carry bones that you dug out of some suspicious graves. Use the luggage space you free by getting rid of the bones to carry some weapons and ammunition.
Suggested actions in case of encounter: Most specialists agree that shouting “Shit!” and running away is an excellent way of dealing with Sasquatch. Sasquatch hunting grounds is not the place to show off what a macho you are.
Suggested killing techniques: The Sasquatch can, in fact, be killed, but don’t expect a pistol or a small caliber to do the trick. You need something big, powerful, and nasty. AK-47 would be a very reasonable bet. Nuking the site from orbit might be a little excessive, but nonetheless is an excellent way to be sure.
Additional Character Images:



Movie Featuring the Character:
- Sasquatch Hunters (2005)

Lillith

Name: Lillith
Category: Supernatural Being, Leader, Villain, Human Predator, Shape Shifter, Vampire, Homosexual, Lesbian
Age: Unknown – potentially hundreds or even thousands of years
Origin: The little known region of Tierra del Fuego that looks surprisingly like Pacific North-West
Habitat: McCutcheon Mortuary/Brothel (325 Bowmont, ask for the Cunningham wake)
General Description: The mother of all vampires and the most horrible woman to ever walk the Earth. A flaming lesbian with a passion for rare blood types, Lillith usually surrounds herself with female vampires and uses them to lure unsuspecting males into her lair.
Friends, Associates, and Sidekicks: Vincent the Villainous Midget
Sworn Enemies: Rafe Guttman
Special Powers: In addition to the basic vampire staple such as super strength and shape-shifting, Lillith possesses advanced immortality skills - she may be taken out of action, but she cannot be killed.
Weapons of Choice: Tongue-tacle, which Lillith uses to choke her victims while simultaneously pushing their hearts out. Unlike her brethren, Lillith does not limit herself to blood sucking via two tiny holes in the neck and often prefers freshly squeezed hearts.
Weaknesses: Lillith can be easily controlled by anyone who possesses a mysterious blood-filled object known as “the key.” Please keep in mind that the key inexplicably explodes easily breaks if dropped, freeing Lillith from its control.
Hobbies: Fulfilling your wildest sexual fantasies... like masturbating cheerleaders (???) and Marilyn Monroe up-skirt reenactment (Really??? You call this wild?)
Pet Peeves: Vegetarians
Best Lines:
1) Don’t eat your heart baby. That’s my job.
2) Care for a little deep throat?
3) I just love a man who gives you head… and let’s you keep it.
4) Breasts are always nice. But I prefer… Oooh.
5) First I am going to rip your dick off, then I’m going to grind your balls into guacamole.
Total Estimated Power Rating: 14
4 Base Intellect Points + 5 Base Physical Power Points + 1 Shock Point + 1 Basic Shape Shifting Point + 3 Advanced Invulnerability Points
Danger Level: High. You wouldn’t think that she is that tough when you first encounter Lillith. Especially if she happens to be in her human form. The looks are deceiving however and the boobs are fake - Lillith might turn you into a vampire and make you her lapdog, but most men she encounters end up having their hearts ripped out...
Identification: If you encounter a heavy-breasted lesbian vampiress who refuses to die when staked – you are probably dealing with Lillith.
How to Avoid: Despite many centuries of causing mayhem, Lillith has never killed a woman. She also hates the taste of vegetarian blood. Which leads us to a logical (and obvious) conclusion that being (or becoming) a vegetarian female is the surest way to avoid Lillith.
If this course of action is not available to you, you can also avoid Lillith by NOT visiting whorehouses.
If the above is not a practical suggestion either, we suggest that you visit only above-ground whorehouses, and sprinkle all your whores with some holy water – just to make sure.
Suggested Actions in Case of Encounter: If you find yourself stuck in the underground bordello surrounded by Lillith and her goons, you have two possible courses of action available:
a) You can surrender to them, ultimately exchanging your life for a brief encounter with silicon boobies;
or
b) You can easily escape through the chimney which leads back to the surface
The choice is yours.
Suggested Killing Techniques: Lillith is not your typical vampire – the standard stake and holy water can’t really harm her. The only sure way to disable her is by using some cross shaped puncture weapon to separate Lillith’ heart into four pieces, removing the heart from the body, and putting the pieces into separate containers to prevent them from touching each other. Sounds complicated?... It is.
NOTE: Not surprisingly the reverse process brings Lillith back to life.
Additional Character Images:



Movies Featuring the Character:
- Bordello of Blood (1996)